Master Tips for researchers with police negotiator Heidi Nieboer
We often think conversations are about content, but emotions set the tone. Former police negotiator Heidi Nieboer emphasizes: start by building connection. Listening, co-creation, and mutual dependency are crucial for creating real impact from research—not just arguments.
We think it’s about the content
When people are deeply invested in a topic, emotions matter more, and objectivity can be hard to find. Heidi Nieboer explains: “The first and most important step is to connect. Whether you’re talking to a parent at school, engaging in a public debate, or negotiating during a demonstration—you always need to build rapport before you can make an impact. We often want to jump straight to the content, but emotions always take precedence.”
Listening is worth its weight in gold
According to Heidi, a good negotiation consists of 70% listening and 30% talking. Often, something else is going on: a conflict of interests. By listening, you make yourself less of a threat in the eyes of your conversation partner.
Practice co-creation—really
Negotiation only becomes possible when there’s something to exchange. It’s essential to understand the other party: what matters to them? Practice co-creation, genuinely. Yes, that can feel uncomfortable if you’ve already thought through the best approach. But new parties always bring new information, and you can use that.
And what if mutual dependency simply doesn’t exist? Then you can always ask for help. The “gain” for the helper might be making a difference for someone else, having an interesting conversation, or expanding their own network.
Interested in the Impact Program?
We are still looking for a few candidates for the Impact Program edition Fall 2026. Contact your supervisor to be put forward, or get in touch with program manager Diane Schöller via d.scholler@amsterdamumc.nl, for more information
